Look for the Signs

Looking back in my life and my marriage, I have never been a big believer in "signs". If I am honest, I try to look for reassurances that I am on the right path or "feelings" that we are where we are supposed to be, but I don't specifically trust "signs". I typically trust in prayer and faith that God is in control either way.

Going back a little, I think my dislike of signs is probably due to my engagement ring. You see, a few months after I got engaged (to the most wonderful man in the world) I started to get irritated skin on my ring finger. Irritation turned into bumps, which turned into blisters, which led to me painting the inside of my engagement ring with clear finger nail polish for several months. Eventually, I did allergy testing and learned that I am allergic to gold. Yes, actually gold. They thought it was the nickel mixed in with the white gold, but no... it's really the gold. Anyway, my sweet husband ended up paying more money to get my ring reset in platinum and needless to say the bumps and redness have been gone ever since. We have also joked ever since that it's a  good thing we don't believe in signs because what does it say if you are allergic to your engagement ring. 

Well friends, this week I want to believe in signs!

January 18, 2012: We attended our IVF Class. We had made the huge decision to pursue treatment and IVF was our first attempt at any type of assisted fertility. It honestly felt like a new beginning because we were so hopeful that this would be the path that led to our first child.

Well fast-forward (or look back and read past posts) and obviously the IVF didn't work. We struggled, we prayed, and then we got excited about adoption being the path that God has planned for our family. I feel incredible peace about this decision and I cannot wait to meet the child and birth family that will become such a significant part of our lives.

January 18, 2013: We got a call from our agency about a potential match. I know almost nothing about the situation except that the expectant mother is due in 3-4 weeks!! (Holy Cow!! I can't even believe it when I write it down) Our agency wanted us to know about this possible situation because we were making plans to turn in applications at other agencies and they didn't want us to unnecessarily waste time or money (which I appreciate). However, we were warned that there was so much more to be done before this was an "official" match. They are still working to located the birth father and until that occurs we will not be in a position to meet with the expectant mother. They also warned us that even if things continue to move along smoothly, they are doubtful that all the legal issues will be handled by the time of birth therefore the child will likely need to go to interim care. Then...they said they would be in touch when they knew more.

So today my friends, I want so badly to believe that this is all a "sign" of great things to come. That our preparation for growing our family that started on January 18, 2012 was really just a stepping stone to God's plan of preparation that started EXACTLY one year later on January 18, 2013. Either way, I am working to keep my focus on Him and trust that even if this situation doesn't work out, our great God still has incredible plans for us and our family.

So, please keep us in your prayers. Most importantly keep this birth family and this child in your prayers.

...untill we know more,

jenn